Friday, April 4, 2008

Reason why I could not sleep last night

I went for a jog with Eric and Adriel just yesterday evening. And being a workaholic and not having a regular exercise daily, it would just take me 2 rounds of the neighbourhood running track to exhaust myself. Yesterday after the run, I was really tired. I went to bed early but still, I just could not fall asleep..Was I thinking of a girl? Yes I was but it was not that factor that made me stay awake. Till that point of time, I do not know the answer to that. Until...it was then that I found out.

Knowing that I can't fall asleep, I decided to go online and find a few friends for a chat. Turned out that the girl I was thinking of, appears to be online..so ya..chatted with her and also helped her get some songs that she wanted. Well, after that she had to go off but I stayed on cause despite how lethargic I am, I still can't get myself to bed..

It was probably 2am which is past midnight, I know that I have work for the day so had to sleep no matter what. So I logged out from msn messenger, close my windows and my media player and just as I click on the shut down icon, my dad walked out of his room and approached me helplessly...I was shocked..I didn't know what happened until I saw him pressing hard on his abdominal area. It was then that I knew he had an extreme spiky gastric pain.My mom was awoken too..Except for my siblings. They were soundly asleep and did not know what was happening. Without much hesitation, I accompanied my dad to the hospital.

It was the Singapore General Hospital that we headed. The atmosphere surrounding the hospital was filled with tranquility (cause 2 am mah...where got many people) There were a number of patients but there weren't many like as if when it's broad daylight. Ya..and once we reached the hospital and after having the adminstration done, within minutes that my dad was consulted by a doctor. That's so fast..! Unlike the usual waiting of 2 hours..So my dad went thru the consultation by himself and I was left waiting outside for him. And I totally did not know how long it will take..but most importantly, I prayed that my dad's gastric would have stopped by then cause when I first saw his facial expression, it shown that he was very pale and very weak...My dad has always been very strong in the family but I did not expect that a gastric pain could just overcome him and made him so weak..

Why must there be illnesses in this world? Why do we have to suffer all these illnesses? Did we actually do something wrong that made us deserve it? Or was it God trying to let us know that whatever obstacles or difficulties it may be, we are able to overcome anything?

It was very cold in the hospital. I was with my t-shirt and shorts. It was freezing for me..I tried to sleep but it was really very cold. I could not sleep once again...I waited and waited. I observed the patients around me..Many thoughts came to my mind, I'm not sure if it was God who wants to enlighten me something...From the people I see, I saw patients who were weak and helpless, some were just lying on the bed waiting for their blood test reports. Then I came to ask myself, "If my love ones were to be ill, am I able to help them in times of need?" Sometimes I just feel that getting into a relationship, like for example girlfriend and boyfriend, is the love as strong as really taking good care of each other or is it just having fun times together by hanging out for dinners and entertainments..?What will the other party do when he or she finds out that his or her love one has fallen sick? Will the person just say drink more water and you'll be fine or would you take the initiative to take him or her to see a doctor and take really good care of him/her until he/she recovers? Does any teens know the true meaning of love back then before getting into a relationship? I doubt many do..Which to me, it just seem so saddening..They just had the misinterpretation of what love is truly about..

It was 6am that my dad's blood test was out, he fell asleep on a bed while waiting for the report. I stood beside his bed and I was assured that he was fine as I could see him resting peacefully. The report was out and his alright, we feared that it was heart-attack (cause my dad felt pain in his chest) or appendicitis. But thank God it was neither. After hearing the good news, I was so relieved. I saw the smile my dad gave and it assured me that he felt better then. We proceeded to the Pharmacy to collect my dad's medication..and after that, we headed home.

Upon reaching home, I was extremely exhausted, I could not think much and straight away I took off my glasses and climbed onto my double-decker bed and soon enough., I fell deeply asleep.

Come to think of it, it was so impossible to why I could not sleep last night despite how tired I am after my jog. I believe that it was God preparing me, He wants me to stay awake and accompany my dad during the time of pain that he was enduring. I thank God for having me being my dad's eldest son to be there to protect my dad during the entire journey. It used to be my dad accompanying me to medical clinics when I was sick but now it's me doing the same responsibility just like my dad did for me.

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